However, there was an afternoon I had there that I somehow forgot to write about, so I wanted to share it in its own post. This is The Paddle Boarding Incident.
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| The unsuspecting eight-man paddle board |
With only three days left until we were all bound to leave our Lixouri camp (#oneteamonedream) the suggestion of paddle boarding at Lepada beach sounded like not only a fun way to fill our afternoon, but also provide some well-cherished memories between the group, before we all came back home. So, with our bikinis and swim shorts layered under our clothing, we trekked off down the road under the mid-afternoon sun.
The eight-man paddleboard, floating on the ridiculously clear teal water, awaited us as we slathered on sun cream and clipped ourselves into life jackets (very fetching, I know). We then had the task of actually getting on the thing, which involved a grand leap – and a hope our swimming bottoms didn’t come down with it!
As someone who has danced for the majority of their life, I thought my balance would be relatively sound. This assumption was completely pulled from underneath me – and this felt very literal – as I was stumbling atop the board like Bambi finding his legs. Once we had the huge oars in our hands, the violent shaking of my legs improved slightly – until people started getting pushed in by other members for fun. Luckily, my demeanour continued to embody that of a baby deer, so I was probably pitied and left on the board.
Soon, we were – in a diagonal sort of way – travelling down the ‘passage’, the stream of the sea that would lead us into a bigger part of the sea, which sits in between Lixouri and Argostoli: you can spot Argostoli’s lighthouse and abandoned hotel from the shoreline of Lixouri, and is about a twenty minute ferry ride between the two areas of Kefalonia.
This is where, on reflection, things started to go downhill: we decided to sit down. It was a unanimous decision to just enjoy our setting and have a chat and paddle, sitting down instead of wavering about on our feet. Even though it was an eight-man board, the six of us were still quite squeezed on, and sitting down did not help the matter. But, it was tranquil, as well as entertaining, to perch virtually atop the water, with the beautiful Kefalonian backdrop encompassing us.
What we were unaware of is that we had drifted. Quite far. So far in fact that when we decided to paddle back, we realised our paddling made no difference: although we weren’t going the wrong way, we weren’t going the right way either and just remained where we were, occasionally spinning in a circle in an attempt to work out which way each of us should paddle. We had hit The Paddle Boarding Incident.
Luckily, I think I was the only one of the group to express an excessive ‘panicker’ gene, so everyone remained relatively calm. (While in my head streams of classics, such as “are we going to get back within the hour we bought?” and “will we actually make it back at all?” and “what happens if I fall in and as I haul myself back on the board, my bikini bottoms fall off?” spiralled around and around.) We were considerably close to Argostoli and were not getting any closer to Lixouri, its beach now just a faint paint stroke.
Our stint on the water was only for an hour, but to try and paddle ourselves back would have taken at least two – unless we had given up, which was more likely, and then who knows how long.
And then our saviour came in a small, loud, bright and embarrassing shape of a speedboat.
“Are they coming to rescue us?”
“I think they are.”
We were so completely badat paddle boarding that a lifeguard had been dispatched to save us from potentially drifting out into the open sea. (We maintained we were simply going to visit Argostoli.)
So, begrudgingly, we all had to clamber on this tiny, telephone-box-red boat – all six of us – and be towed back to the shore, with the paddleboard flapping behind us.
“Does this happen a lot? You having to come and rescue people?” we asked the lifeguard, taking a gap year he said, so probably about 18 and therefore younger than any of us by at least a year.
“To beginners, yeah.”
Huh. We looked like complete amateurs even to strangers. Who knew?
We stumbled safely to shore, tossed off our life jackets – then respectfully hung them back up in their hut – and agreed that next time, solo paddle boarding may be a better option than the eight-man fiasco, which caused The Paddle Boarding incident.